Category: yoga
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Rapid Rebirth pt. 1
Holding onto the edge of the hospital bed, I release low and guttural groans as I drop deeper into my physical body. I have been preparing for this moment for the last nine months, and now that it’s here, I am trying to catch my breath. There is no pause, no break, no moment to…
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Laborland
I witnessed a Birth today. Not just a metaphorical birth, but the actual birth of a child – my niece. My sister has traveled into the labor realm three separate times before today to retrieve her children, and each birth has been drastically different. I cannot speak for her experiences. I can only speak from…
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Depth of feeling
Growth feels like a splash of cold water running down your spine, a flailing ego that refuses to be quiet, a door slammed in your face, and thoughts that remain defiant. Growth feels like a soft smile that follows a deep sigh, a warm home-cooked meal, an intentional drop of your shoulders, and a moment…
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Angst
Dim lights, Strong voices, Vibrating electricity, Competing noises. Lip biting, Skin picking, Nail chewing, Anxiety tripping. I hear in color, And can see in sound. I feel in waves, The emotion compounds. Honing in on details, And processing words, Watching every expression, As my mind tries to learn. I feel so different, Sometimes left behind.…
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Negative attention
I used to starve myself. It began in 2008 when I was diagnosed with a handful of gastrointestinal issues. Doctors assumed I was bulimic because I often threw up the contents of my stomach as my entire body was having reactions to mostly everything that I was consuming. I was afraid to eat because I…
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Sit with it
In many ways, we’ve been brought up to quiet any talk or thoughts regarding the state of our own mental health. Emotions are labeled as good and bad. As kids we are often told that we are okay rather than asked. As adults we’ve formulated a robotic response of “I’m okay” when asked. If we…
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bodies
My confidence was once through the roof and I practiced/lived in undies or a bathing suit. I had no fears of showing off my body because I was comfortable and felt safe in my skin. I had cellulite, blemishes, lumps, fat, and imperfections but I didn’t focus on those things. Post-pregnancy is a whole different…
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Uncharted territory
I often forget how our bodies are naturally in sync with the seasons. There are periods throughout the year where my body begs for activity and there are moments when it begs for stillness. Right now I’m somewhere in between. Some days my mind wants the movement and my body doesn’t care to keep up.…
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Home practice
After one of the very first yoga classes I ever took, I heard the teacher talking to a student about cultivating a home practice. I had never heard of that term before and I tried to make sense of it for a couple of years. While I was certain that it meant practicing yoga at…
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Dark poetry
We are so quick to close the door after an experience. We allow the small details to fester and disintegrate within our own bodies and minds. But why not keep that door open and allow others to see in? Why not allow others to watch the unfolding and unraveling? Not because I think it’s important…