Tag: emotional
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Dark poetry
We are so quick to close the door after an experience. We allow the small details to fester and disintegrate within our own bodies and minds. But why not keep that door open and allow others to see in? Why not allow others to watch the unfolding and unraveling? Not because I think it’s important…
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Island
Darkness courses through my veins just as light emanates from my body. I see, feel, process, internalize, and communicate differently than some others, and sometimes I feel like an island. People can see my silhouette from a distance but upon getting closer they just can’t grasp the complexities of what is before them. My emotions…
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Mrs. Jones
I started shaving my legs in 5th grade. Not because the hair was dark or bothersome, but because my friends were doing it. That means before I even entered into my teens I was conforming to societies standards of beauty and womanly upkeep. In middle school, I joined in with a bunch of my friends…
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Academia
Grade school and I never really meshed well… I was far too physically active, mentally distanced, or not intrigued enough to fully dive in. And on top of that, I was a young beautiful girl in a public school system which felt like I was a minnow thrown into a deep cage with hundreds of…
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Acceptance
Some of the areas in which I am learning to accept myself: I accept I am a human being before I am a parent I accept I have limitations and many shortcomings, and this is okay I accept I don’t always know the right way I accept I am often ashamed to admit my own…
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Fight, flight, or freeze
I’m relentlessly tossed around in the rush of a wave pool (constructed by my own choices) begging for the machine to turn off. Lifeguards watch from the sidelines, mistaking my fearful face with a face of adrenaline. I want to get out. I can’t gain my footing even though the ground isn’t far from my…
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Multifaceted
Learning how to love myself genuinely is proving to be one of the more challenging lessons I’ve been faced with. (And I mean love, not tolerate.) There’s a difference between looking at yourself in a mirror and truly seeing yourself for who you are, flaws and all. It’s easy to fall victim to the mindset…
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Limited language
There are times when I want to claw my skin off. Not necessarily to get rid of the skin that I wear but more so to release what I feel is trapped inside. I have found that words cannot properly express what it is that I’m trying to convey, and because of that I feel…
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Life after birth
When people talk about their birth story occasionally you’ll hear a resentful tone in their voice. They might speak of their labor being too long, or maybe there were too many interventions for their liking, or it was too painful, or the epidural didn’t take, or the Pitocin made it too intense, and the list…
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My daughters birthday
Throughout the pregnancy, I swore she was going to come earlier than her guess date of September 6. Clearly this was just what I wanted since I had no actual way of knowing that. The closer that day came, the more the anticipation grew. Almost to the point of becoming disappointed that I was so…
The Sacred Body 